I had one Grandma who loved cooking and baking, and another who preferred to eat at restaurants. When I watched Nonnas, a movie based on the true story of Staten Island, New York restaurant, Enoteca Maria, where grandmothers are the chefs cooking family recipes, it reminded me of both of my Grandmas, and the lessons they taught me.
Nonnas tells the true story of Joe Scaravella, who after experiencing the loss of his beloved Nonna (Italian for grandma) and parents, he pursues opening a restaurant — on a whim — in their honor. With no experience in hospitality, he invests everything he has and almost loses his full-time job trying to make his vision real. It’s a story of family, friendship and food with a dash of resilience. The restaurant gave Joe a purpose and the women who cook there, too. In a CBS Sunday Morning segment, Joe Scaravella shares the story of a Greek Yaya who cooks at Enoteca Maria:
“When she came here she was all dressed in black, visibly depressed. We talked about her coming in to cook and what ingredients she would need and what she would make…. Every time she would come, you’d see a little more color in her outfit, until finally colored blouses. It’s like the life came back into her.”
While Nonnas takes place in a restaurant, a beauty parlor and Brooklyn homes, the lessons from it are relevant to life and work. As I reflected on the influence my grandmothers had on me – both in the kitchen and at restaurants, but most vividly at ice-cream parlors, I realized how much of them I show up with me daily. I reached out to leaders featured on The Switchboard for stories of elders — family members, parents or grandparents — who have taught them leadership lessons. Below are our stories. I welcome you to share your lessons from elders in the comments.
“My Grandmas gave me a love for sweets from baking together to ice cream parlor outings, but also the reality. While life isn’t always filled with chocolate chips and sprinkles, a little sweetness could go a long way with how you treat others. When all I had was lemon, they taught me to figure out a recipe for lemonade. I have a summer memory of one of my Grandmas taking me for ice cream every day after camp. Years later, I realized how expensive that summer must gave been for her on a budget, but I believe she gave me what she didn’t have as a child. And those sweet memories together were priceless.”
“One of the best lessons I learned from my Poh Poh (grandma) is to just keep moving. She's turning 97 this year, and that's her secret to longevity. In communications, this means we can't get bogged down by a single challenge or a difficult project. We adapt, we learn, and we push forward, because our environment is always changing. We just keep moving.”
“My grandmother is turning 100 in October and she always has one consistent message: Family should always be together - if something is on your mind, talk out your problems. While businesses aren't families, I believe this holds. When people hold back for fear of damaging a relationship or awkwardness, I find it strains the relationship even more. Keeping open lines of communication and talking things out right away, to me feels easier, less of a big deal, and normalizes feedback and communication setting a tone for the relationship. As a Radical Candor coach, we say, two minutes a day of brushing your teeth, avoids the root canal.”
“My grandma [Thelma Silverman], who was a wonderful gossip, taught me that details make the story. She could turn the most mundane event (e.g. Cousin Frieda went to the podiatrist. I had to go to three stores for this flank steak.) into a memorable tale. I apply that lesson to even the most 'corporate' communications by adding sensory details that stick with the reader and underscore the humanity of the subject.”
“My Granny taught me to be generous with joy. She always wore a smile, was never stingy with laughter … and it was contagious and made you want to engage. In my day to day as a communications professional, I try to act on this lesson in hopes that others feel more at ease with me and more likely to collaborate and work with me.”
One lesson I carry from my grandfather is that how you make people feel in a conversation lasts far longer than the words themselves. He didn’t just speak, he connected with people and that connection is what created real impact!
"My mom immigrated from the Philippines and built a long career as a secretary at a tech company - staying organized, managing egos, and keeping things moving with quiet precision. She didn’t just take messages; she shaped them. She knew how to read a room, soften tension, and make people feel heard - reminding me that some of the most powerful communicators don’t have titles, just trust."
“My late father, who was an immigrant like me and also an epidemiologist, always repeated to me, "Everything you write down, you remember better". This simple advice has stuck with me: I am an avid note-taker who believes that letting an idea go unwritten risks losing it. Whether on paper or digitally, taking notes has been a key part of how I retain information and develop ideas as a professional communicator. Writing things down is more than just a way to remember: it’s a way to think, process, create, and recreate. The notes I take wherever I go are a wellspring of inspiration and strategy that continuously shape my approach to my work.
In my family my grandparents all came from different countries, on my mom's side I have my Chinese grandfather Raymond and my part Canadian/ Scottish grandmother Maud and on my father's side I have my French grandfather Roland and Italian grandmother Nina. What it taught me at an early age, looking around the table, is there are as many realities as there people and we all have the capacity to love and connect with each other.
Thank you to everyone for sharing your stories with me and trusting me with your beautiful memories. I invite you to comment on this post with wisdom from your elders.
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Fantastic post, Julia! Oma, my grandma, and many of my older relatives (including my parents!), taught me the value of sharing the stories of our lives and passing them on to future generations so they (and we!) will not be forgotten.
Fantastic post, Julia! Oma, my grandma, and many of my older relatives (including my parents!), taught me the value of sharing the stories of our lives and passing them on to future generations so they (and we!) will not be forgotten.
Sweetest post and photos ☺️